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Still, here are a few suggestions for how to try to make it work with a significant other who is struggling, or how to let them go. Some days will be effortless, and others may be draining.The first thing that may come to mind when you first learn of your partner’s condition is to opt out. The answer is, you’ve gotten yourself into a relationship that you now realize may have a few additional obstacles, but what relationship doesn’t experience its hurdles anyway? That really depends on the nature of the condition as well as its severity.
Then, once you’ve passed that phase, it’s on to really getting to know the other person.
On the flip side, if you know someone who seems to be on a downhill spiral with their condition, don’t scare your partner by saying, “look, I just don’t want you to turn out like Tom, Dick and Harry.” Again, that puts a lot of pressure on your partner, and pressure is the last thing that’s going to make him or her feel comfortable in his or her own skin and capable of dealing with his or her condition. Your partner needs to feel like you trust him or her, just as you would want to feel trusted by your partner.
Don’t make your partner feel like they need to be on a leash or like you are his or her patient.
You know you’re superficially compatible, but what about the important things—values, life goals, political beliefs?
Let’s say you care about this person enough to consider spending the rest of your life with them.
Then, there are the practical questions to consider, like are you willing to move for said person, or what is said person’s health history? What do you do when the person you’re falling for is struggling with a condition that’s too complex for even your partner to understand?
A 2010 report from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration reported that 19.9 percent of adults in the U. reported having a mental health condition that year.That’s a pretty hefty chunk of the dating pool, not to mention the unreported cases and the probable addition of cases since that report was published.Mental health conditions come in far too many forms—depression, suicidal tendencies, anxiety, bipolar disorder, OCD, substance abuse, addiction, eating disorders, schizophrenia, personality disorders, autism and Asperger’s, those that don’t immediately come to mind and so many layers within each of those conditions—to try to come up with a one-size fits all approach for how to deal with dating someone who is mentally ill.You need to assure your partner that “normal” isn’t what you want, that you want him or her to be happy and healthy.That you don’t pity him or her and that you only want what’s best.Dealing with a mental illness or disorder can be one of the most debilitating and discouraging experiences someone can endure.